The Glory Of Group-Think

Alright we're gonna play a little game here......

I'm gonna lay out three instances of phenomenon and leave it up to YOU to guess what it is.

You game??

OK here they are:

1- A news piece on "the community" is done that portrays studying success with women in a negative light, and people get annoyed that something they're a part of is being disliked by the mainstream.

2- The "trend of the week" in pickup (ie: compliments VS teases / structured gameplan VS free flowing) is something someone disagrees with, and he goes and makes post after post on various internet forums about how the trend is wrong and he wants everyone to see the light.

3- A famous guru keeps a semi circle of eyes-glazed-over followers around him at all times, and the followers constantly look to their guru to discover their own path.

Any guesses?? What's the commonality here??

Well I guess the title of the article kind of gave it away......... :)

What we're talking about is the bizarre nature of human psychology in all it's glory.

It's the phenomenon known as RELYING ON GROUP THINK.

The way it works is basically that people have two ways of determining their sense of "reality":

1) First hand experience.

2) The second hand experience of other people.

Because we don't have the time and energy to verify everything about the world for ourselves, our psychology is usually tuned to rely most heavily on 2nd hand information.

There's a whole intricate system to this -- which if you've experienced The Blueprint then you're versed in my spiel on that.

The long and short of it is that the stronger your ability is to SEE THE WORLD THROUGH YOUR OWN EYES the more confidence you can gain more quickly.

This actually results in you being a lot more attractive to women, but that's a whole 'nother story.

Right here what we're talking about is this.......:

The "dating community" is supposed to teach you how to see the world through your own eyes and become a a man who dictates his own sense of reality.

But more often than not it winds up as just a NEW form of social conditioning & group think to replace the old crutch previously provided by the mainstream.

Now let's breakdown the three examples under this new light.

1- What the mainstream masses think about studying success with girls has nothing to do with you.

Literally nothing. No, no, duuuuude, it's like, literally NOTHING to your life.

You can try all day long, but you will not find a single tangible change to your day-to-day existence based on whether the media's coverage of this stuff is favourable or not.

And it *definitely* doesn't affect the way women respond to you.

So why would you feel an emotional reaction to a story, or even invest a single minute of your life into watching a nonsense media spectacle AT ALL??

Well if you're noticing this in yourself, it's probably because you've been drawing your confidence from a "well" of group-think.

If more people accepted your way of thinking then the "I want people to agree with me" mechanism up in your head would be happier with you.

This would raise your confidence, and funny enough, make you more confident around women because you'd feel like you're doing the "right thing".

Even though what other people think means absolutely nothing -- so long as YOU are getting the results that you want.

Next........

2- What other people in the community think about what works FOR YOU has nothing to do with the way you choose to interact and relate to women.

I've read posts from guys who said they used to get success using pick up lines and then read about going natural and lost confidence in what they were doing before (or vice versa).

Uhhhh, why??!!

If what you were doing before was getting you the dating & sex life that you wanted then why would you switch it up??

Again, if you're one of those guys then the reason is probably that you were previously gaining confidence in the "pick up lines" from the fact that there was a whole community of guys claiming they worked.

Pull that out of the equation and it's like the rug being ripped out from under you, and that's just nonsense.

One of my goals in creating The Blueprint as a "set of principles" instead of a "how to" was because what works for YOU is not always what will work for somebody else.

The bottom line is this: if you THINK what you're saying to a woman will "work" then it PROBABLY WILL.

That's because of the confidence and congruence that you have behind it, and so when you're talking to her she's feeling that vibe and energy coming off of you.

So whether a bunch of guys who you`ve never met on the internet agree with you or not, you have to find your own way of doing things.

And lastly.........

3- Just because a "guru" offers you his or her experience does not mean that it alleviates you the responsibility of having to think.

One of the freakiest aspects of the "guru phenomenon" is that in many cases the guru initially has LESS confidence than the average person.

What needs to be understood here is that most people who lack confidence will respond by becoming introverted or deferring to other people constantly.

But in the case of a "guru" its often somebody who has learned an "alternate strategy" where they gain enough people to surround them and validate what they're saying that they can say:

"Look, all these people agree with me...I must be right!!"

Meanwhile the followers all get to say:

"Wow there's all these other people who agree with him/her....He/she must be right!!"

So there is basically a symbiotic relationship going on here.

Both the guru and the followers are exploiting eachother as a crutch to gain a stronger sense of their own beliefs.

This is actually a topic that goes a lot deeper and it deserves it's own article -- including of my own experiences with it, because they are freaky and bizarre.

OK so what is a healthy approach to knowledge then??

Well first of all, it's great to go out and seek new ideas.

Looking for better opinions, cultures, and perspectives is always one of the best things you can ever do.

Beyond that, being involved in a mastermind group that continually attunes your mind to the "frequencies" (as they say) of presence and abundance is probably one of the biggest factors for learning success with women that you can possibly find.

The difference between a healthy approach and a bone-headed one is whether or not you're moving towards your own core or just replacing one form of social conditioning with another.

So next time you feel yourself having an emotional reaction to someone not agreeing with you, ask yourself:

-"Am I reacting because I rely on other people to agree with me in order to feel confident that my sense of reality is accurate??"

-"Am I reacting because the foundation that my sense of reality is laid upon is shaky and easily de-stabilized??"

-"Am I reacting because secretly I'm not sure whether I'm right or wrong??"

And if any of those are the case, then start continually "putting yourself in check" when you feel yourself relying on the crutch of people's opinions instead of seeing the world through your own eyes.

In fact here's a tip for you to play around with...

Whenever you feel the urge to correct somebody, experiment with just letting it go.

Notice how it makes you feel BETTER because you're confirming to yourself that you don't need other people's approval to be certain of your beliefs.

Moreover, notice how when you slip up and correct somebody that you feel the cheap thrill of their agreement followed by a buyer's remorse for knowing how irrational it was to care about what they think.

Of course there's a big difference between straightening out a buddy to help him out and relying on other people's agreement as an addiction to a psychological crutch -- but this is obvious by the emotions you feel in your body when you open your mouth.

The act of "offering value" always aligns you with the present moment and a clean feeling of self esteem.

The act of "taking value" (ie: speaking to gain agreement from the other person) will conversely get you in your head and leave you feeling antsy and clasping for straws.

Anyway hopefully this article hasn't been too aggressive or freaked anyone out.

It's just a little something to let stew up in the noggin' for the next time you find yourself caring about other people's approval of your ideas.

Of course it's always good to cross-reference your beliefs with outside input whenever possible -- the challenge is knowing the difference between when it's constructive or just useless and absurd.

Have fun!!


Tyler

PS: Been hearing all sorts of crazy rumours about some sort of massive Summer Special -- you NEED to click this link to see what I'm talking about: www.rsdsummerspecial.com.

PPS: Tim has been super active on his blog. Have a quick click over to: www.naturaltim.com.

Tim Vanishes...........And Then Re-Appears

Word has it that Tim is now back in Los Angeles after his leg in Australia and Tokyo.

I'm hearing rumours about some intresting activity over on his blog recently, so I think I'll click over and check it out.

And you're invited.

Just take a quick click over with me to www.naturaltim.com.

Woooooooooooo!!!!!


Tyler

Woooooooo, got the Spanish soundtrack for this latin-style'd article.

So. Yes.

Just jammed back into Honolulu after 3 months of straight travel.

Nice little jaunt around the continent. I've got mixed emotions about being back.

First few weeks it was all "Get me the out of here I wanna go home!!" but by the end it was like "Keep. Going. Bitches. MORE."

Excursion started in Los Angeles and then off to X-Games in Aspen for RSD Executive Retreat.

Hit that up with the crew, it was amazing.

Watching Ciaran and Toli stuck up on the hill the whole day, classic!! Carving down the hills in Aspen I felt like a happy little kid again.


Next up was Ottawa to get the passport renewed.

Damn that thing was in need of replacement. Every time I went through customs they laughed at me asking if I'd put it in the laundry.

Good thing I know how to talk.

Social dynamics, Luke Skywalker style: You WILL let me into your country, this passport is JUST FINE.

While in Ottawa it was 20 hour day workmode leading up to The Blueprint launch, causing me to get sick for the first time in a long while.

Got up in the middle of the night and remember feeling the "life force" draining out of my body -- thinking melodramatically that my heart had just randomly stopped.

Then it was drop, thud, and kiss the floor. New horizontal position much better. Feeling the blood slowly trickling back in my brain.

First time I've ever fainted. Interesting experience. I think one time is enough.

Lay there around an hour gathering the strength back and then crawled downstairs and to start pounding water. Yum yum.

Next day laid in bed staring at the wall totally still thinking I could somehow heal myself, which apparently actually worked.

Got up for the final 24 hours leading up to the launch and wrapped it about 1 minute before the noon deadline.

Blueprint is in orbit. The rest is history.

Thus the trip began. Definitely the hardest travelling I've done so far. Fifteen cities in six weeks.

What follows is an assembly of maybe 0.0001% of the experience.

Fully loaded with pictures. Click them to see the full sized versions, many are much cooler that way.

With The Blueprint wrapped I hit the Ottawa airport and flew out to Toronto, linked back up with my girlfriend in Mexico City, and headed down to Acapulco.

What did I expect?? No expectations.

Toli the genius lends me his oceanfront double-story penthouse in the heart of the main strip which was the bomb.

Thanks Toli!!


Apparently Acapulco was a mega classy hotspot during the 1960s when Elvis Prestley and Elizabeth Taylor used to visit.

Now it's more of a cheesy Spring Break type deal -- like Tijuana on steroids.

Still, easy to enjoy when you've got Toli's kickass pad.

Main tourist strip is absolutely fine, although very funny with all the little "Herby" style 1960s taxis buzzing around.

One of this proud fleet even had blacklights and music and a strobe inside, creating a mini-danceclub for this insane taxi driver to blast around town in.

Boom, boom, boom, ayyyyyyyyyeeeeee!!!


Learned how to drive Mexico-style very quickly. Not by choice but by necessity.

Driving Latin America is like playing a mini game of "Chicken" with every lane change. Fun!!

Rule: Do NOT use your turn signal or driver behind you will jump in and take your spot.

No, no, no politeness allowed. Polite people will be chopped into bite sized gringo-chunks and used as street-meat in the roadside taco stands.

This is about showing you're willing to crash and destroy your car more than the other driver is. No fear. Point and shoot style.

To the victor goes the spoils of the lane and then you're off to duke it out with the next road warrior.

Anywayzzzz, restaurants up on hill overlooking the ocean were fantastic. My favourite was this Thai-fusion place called "Zibu".


Good to relax and unplug from the insanity of the previous month.

Found myself thinking about work constantly at first, which I later learned to turn off and just chill.


Was also a very cool earthquake while we were down there.

Girlfriend and I are in the gym and hear somebody drop a big rack of weights. Except it keeps going and going. And going. We realize it's an earthquake.

Mexico though. Expected. Whatever.

From there I grab the girlfriend by the hair, caveman style, and drag her kicking and screaming to Taxco.

Or maybe we just pleasantly decided to go mutually. I can't remember.

Taxco is a little silver mining town about 3 hours outside of Acapulco. Pulling into this place was like going back in time.

Felt like a Hayao Mazaki movie.

Night time arrival, we see the old town laid up against the side of a mountain.

This is the first experience of the "real" Mexico. The trip will have many more.

Hotel is up on a massive hill.

We drive and drive, up, up, up, until we eventually reach the top. Amazing view of a mysterious city with bells ringing and energy buzzing down below.

Check in and drive back down the hill. I'm nervous and inexperienced in this type of environment.

Find a great restaurant and view the city from atop the roof.

There's fireworks going off, with sounds of booming and the bells echoing off the mountains -- burned into my mind for hours afterwards.

Next morning we wake up and look out to a to view that's entirely different during the day.


Blast down the hill and check out the city. So cool. So interesting.


Different cars, different houses, different ways of life.

Their lives seem smaller, more connected to community. Maybe bigger in that regard, you know, surface VS depth type stuff.

They're visibly happier than most in the surrounding region, probably because of the thriving silver industry.


Money can't buy happiness, true.

But sustenance is absolutely vital and these people have achieved it.


Driving back home it's all about the "free highway" as opposed to the pay highway. Poverty is visible and very painful to see.

State of Guerrero -- extremely poor, extremely ill-maintained.

Random animals all over the streets and garbage framing every inch of the highways.

Entire state of Guerrero smells strongly of ash from farmers clearing their fields...burning sides of the roads to clear the trash.


We run out of cash to pay the toll roads. No credit cards accepted??!! Uhhh, woops.

It was the final tunnel through the mountain, and I know we're in a sticky situation because the toll is nearly $10 for a short little section of road.

What mayhem would it have allowed us to avoid?? Let's find out.

Back up in reverse and weave through oncoming traffic on this latin american highway. The other road warriors are thrilled.

Take the route through the "non-tourist side of the mountain" of Acapulco to get back home.

People hustling to make a few pesos everywhere you look. Some who can't afford clothes walking around aimlessly.

Get home, plan the trip for Puerto Escondido the next day. Wake up, and we're off.

Drive is literally 8 hours of endless "ejidos" shanty towns -- shacks on small-scale subsistence farms that produce for local markets.

People seem malnourished and stare at you as you pass. Government controlled Pemex gas stations are like little slices of Beverly Hills to stop in every few hours. You realize as you pass through literally an entire state of these conditions that this is not just isolated, but how most people in the world actually live.

Finally we get into Puerto Escondido which was priceless.


Puerto is one of the premiere surf locations on the planet.

You drive through town until you get to the "Playa Zicatela" -- the strip where all the hippies and surfers live.

A whole culture there. It's still off the beaten path to an extent so it's got an authentic vibe.

Until you've been to a place like this there's really very little way to describe it. You've just got to experience it for yourself.


Explore the city for the day, eat in the restaurants, talk to the people, generally screw around.

The girlfriend has a big allergic reaction for some reason that night, breaking out in hives.

At first we notice it on her arms. Then we look and it's "Damn it's on your entire body!!"

Walk downstairs, ask "Where's the nearest hospital??" and they laugh like "Uhhhh, you don't want to go to the hospital in Puerto Escondido senior."

Jump in the car and head into the super shady downtown area in the middle of the night. Wonderful.

Locate some Benedryl type stuff in a streetside pharmacy and luckily it gets rid of the hives overnight.

It's the first time it occurs to me that many of the basic securities I take for granted in North America are not always available.


Next day is fantastic.

I teach myself how to ATV along the ocean and up in the hills. Comes in handy later in the trip.


We watch a few pro surfers getting dragged around on Jet-Skis into 15 foot hardhitting waves, then bounce for Oaxaca City.


Trip to Oaxaca is through the mountains and a challenging drive.

Just like the the Puerto trip it's filled with poverty and random animals on the street you have to watch out for.


These people live without our comforts, appear to find happiness in their familial and communal bonds.

Maybe they are happier than us. Maybe just frustrated. Who knows??


The endless curves are nauseating for the first few hours.

Brakes on the van are starting to wear out so I have to make sure that they last until we reach the next town -- otherwise take a fun roll down the side of a cliff.

It's all good, all a part of the fun.


Views up in the mountain are amazing. Total freedom.


Eventually we come out of the mountains into a more desert type region.

Beautiful, relieving, great to be out of the mountains with those shoddy brakes.


We start seeing little cities as we approach the main Oaxaca City.

I have no idea what to expect or what it will be like.

All I know is Oaxaca has many natives and some who speak in native tongues.


Keep driving with Oaxaca City just past this last horizon.


A mix of natural beauty and ill-kept towns as we approach.

Mexico is ultimately a different world just beyond the man-made Southern border of the United States.


Always love roads with trees tracing them like this. Don't know why.


Finally hit Oaxaca city. Outskirts.

A day's driving has paid off, and the brakes on the vehicle have held up to boot.


Can't believe it.

The hotel is simultaneously a government congress building. It's a giant stone mansion with gardens and green dining areas in the middle.

Makes any American hotel look like....whatever.


Hit up the night time entertainment.

Whole time I'm thinking "Man I should be in my hotel watching TV". Ummm, no.


Head downtown, walk around, check it out.

Going to bed that night CNN is on the television.

All the driving of the past few days, it occurs to me on a deep level for the first time in my life that all the crazy shit you see in the news is actually real -- or at least about real places.

Tripped me out, I'm texting back and forth with Tim who's back in Los Angeles.


City looks different in the morning. Nice.


Ever wondered what the widest tree in the entire world looks like?? I hadn't.

Well this is it.

Not the tallest. Not the biggest. But the widest known tree on the planet.

Uh huh.


Oaxacan natives. Zapotec, many speak a native language and do not speak Spanish.


Wonderful people. Mostly dirt poor, after the tourist-deterring violence that broke out due to union strikes in Oaxaca the previous year.

Some are successful, many create income for themselves by crafting exotic rugs and beautiful hand-painted figurines.

They appear to work much harder than we do. Didn't sense that any of them had any issue with it or complained.


BAM!! Hit the first ruins.

Monte Albán. Very important historical/archaeological find.


Amazing city. Amazing that an entire culture thrived before wiping eachother out, the remains being mopped up by the Spanish.


There are stone carvings of disfigured people up against the walls.

Royalty used to inbreed and created them to research the cause of the birth defects. Keepin' it in the family!!


Water channels run underneath the city. It was elaborate.

Amazing to believe it's just gone, makes you wonder about the fragile nature of our own civilization.


Back to Oaxaca City centro.

Known as "la Verde Antequera" for being mostly built in green tinted stone.


Then out for another night in the Plaza de la Constitución.

Local entertainers spot me as a gringo with a latin girl and decide to tool me relentlessly.

Backing up into me yelling in Spanish that I'm grabbing them from behind. Saying I'm a gringo and it's not my fault I don't know any better.

The whole crowd is laughing. Hilarious. Awesome vibe. People are connected to one another, having fun.

None of this faceless chode in the crowd on his way home to watch TV nonsense. It's a community and it comes across healthy and good.


Done with Oaxaca, off to Puebla.

Driving is amazing. The toll roads are easy and smooth. Minimal road-warrioring.


Gotta enjoy the journey, no??

Big chunks of the trips are spent driving so you learn how to have fun with it.


Love the winding roads. I want see the whole world, every city, and everything in between.


First time I've seen big landscapes full of cactuses. Kept looking at it curiously while I was driving.

Do not crash, do not crash.


Yup, made it to Puebla.

What a city. Wealthy. Cultural. Historical.

Inventors of the great Mexican dish "Mole Pueblano" -- what more could you want??


Puebla is a mix between New York, Montreal, and Mexico City -- all fused together in a big happy threesome.

From being there a few days it felt like a model of a city in Latin America that absolutely works.


Loaded with hundreds of historic churches, you can hit up a different church-venue every day of the year if that's your thing.


They're everywhere. Mexico is a very Catholic country. Gives the city a European feel.


Big volcano on the way out.

Used to be covered in a giant glacier, up until this century when it retreated and exposed the mountain as a result of accelerating climate change.


Passed through a city unexpectedly on the way back to Acapulco. Cuernavaca.

Outlying areas were stellar, fresh weather, rolling hills, and blue flowers in the trees.


City of Cuernavaca itself was, well, a city.

Stayed a few hours and then bounced. Wonder if I'd have found anything interesting had I been around longer.


Pay highways on the way back were of stark contrast to the free highways.

Mexican tolls are among the highest in the world, usually costing fifty to a few hundred to get from Point A to Point B.

Benefits include road that's nearly free of traffic, minimal pot holes, and far fewer psychotic drivers (ie: people who actually care if they die or not more than they care about dominating the road).


Found these bridges to be interesting for some reason.

Wonder what it takes to build these roads cutting through the mountains, it must be insane.


Back to Acapulco, fly out during sunset to Mexico City -- AKA Mexico D.F. (Distrito Federal).

Heard nothing but horror stories about it up until this point. Travellers I come across seem to have no love for the D.F.

Supposedly endless traffic, scary motherfuckers trying to kidnap you, yada yada.

True?? Doubtful. Second largest city in the world, most important economic and cultural centre in the country -- it's gotta be cool.

Most people on airplanes look blasé about it, sitting there watching Rush Hour 3 or Kung Fu Panda on the screen.

I find air travel mindblowing and often stare out the window most of the trip if there's anything interesting.


Get into Mexico City. Drive from irport feels like coming into LA or NYC.

We're at The W Hotel in Polanco, where Papa and co. come to meet me for RSD stuff. Good to see friends again.

Next eight days it's like living back in the US.


Zocalo in Mexico City is wicked -- one of the largest squares in the world.

For me it's a more evocative and inspiring capital than any I've seen in my travels so far.


Art gallery off to the side is surrounded by a big labour strike.

Gotta love how they strike down there, so dramatic, makes American strikes seem tame.

Remember waking up last year in Argentina with the apartment spray painted "Fuck Bush" by protesters wearing ski masks and burning American flags.

Inside the gallery is a corridor-long painting depicting the entire known history of Mexico -- from the times of the natives to the Spanish conquerors and beyond.

Makes you think about your own life, your place in history, what false beliefs you might be under, and how people will see the lifestyle you lived in years to come.


Crazy how much European influence you find in Mexico compared to the rest of North America.

Never know what to expect down there.


Was surprised to find a building similar in appearance to Empire State -- Torre Latinoamericana.


"Hey bro -- what's down there??!!"

"Oh yeah, that's the ruins of the Aztec city we destroyed and built the D.F. on top of back in the 1500s.

Figured it was nice real estate, naw mean??"


"Yup, yup, it used to look like this. All, like, happy and stuff."



"Now it looks like THIS.......Wooooot!!"

Whatever, a lot of shit happened back in the day.

And modernity does have it's conveniences. Mexico City is pretty glorious, like a NYC or LA that's off the radar of most people in North America.

Maybe we could avoid repeating this though.


At least we've got these cool archaeological finds to check out in museums.


Apparently found in lakes and various hiding spots.

Few remaining pieces that weren't destroyed when they realized the economic viability of wiping the culture off the map.


Outskirts of Mexico City contains some of the most exclusive real estate in the world.

Move there, and YOU TOO can own your own shanty shack.

Only trouble is trying to figure out which one is yours when you drive back home from work.

"Uhhhh, I think that's me up in the top corner of the mountain....The faceless grey one."

"Oh wait a sec....They all have that....Hmmmmmmmm."


Gotta see it to believe it. Nothing can really prepare you.

First time seeing this type of situation was on the way in from the airport in Rio De Janeiro last year.


Every country and major city in the world has it's own socio-economic problems.

It's the endless ocean of it here that's so flooring.

Too large in scope for the average person to make any sense out of, so you just look at this and shrug your shoulders and get back to your life.

"Hey wasn't there a new Paris Hilton video on TMZ??"

CLICK.


Jump over to Teotihuacan, an hour outside Mexico City.

Pyramid of the Moon.


And of course, Pyramid of the Sun, third largest in the world.

Imagine being a native living in a village out in the jungle and walking in to see this place??

You can imagine these types of constructions, and the resources required to build them, were likely so outside people's realities back then that superstition was the only way to rationalize their existence.

Easy to connect the dots between this and the Vatican City from last summer.

Awe-inspiring but also obviously designed (whether intentionally or unintentionally) to bring folks into submission to their system of beliefs.


On the drive back from Teotihuacan there's the Lady of Guadalupe --- cultural and religion icon in Mexico.

From Wikipedia:

"According to traditional Catholic accounts of the Guadalupan apparition, during a walk from his village to the city on December 9, 1531,[1] Juan Diego saw a vision of a Virgin at the Hill of Tepeyac.

Speaking in Nahuatl, Our Lady of Guadalupe asked him to build an abbey at that site. When Juan Diego spoke to the Spanish bishop, Fray Juan de Zumárraga, the bishop asked him for a miraculous sign to prove his claim. The Virgin asked Juan Diego to gather flowers, even though it was winter when no flower bloomed.

He found Castillian roses, gathered them on his tilma, and presented these to bishop Zumárraga. When he presented the roses to Zumárraga, the image of the Virgin of Guadalupe miraculously appeared imprinted on the cloth."

Interesting to see the girlfriend's reaction, as a girl with a fully traditional Mexican upbringing.


Zoooom, Mexico City wrapped up it's off to the second largest city in Mexico -- Guadalajara.

Downtown is very historical and fascinating, city itself is seems more or less North American.


People in Mexico often fill your head with warnings to be careful, especially at night.

Downtown is supposedly dangerous at night, true or not I have no idea, so that's solved by throwing on the hoodie to appear like a trouble-maker.

Oftentimes in supposedly dangerous cities you just dress funny -- walk around shirtless to appear homeless or grow long hair and a beard to look like a broke hippie.


Easter weekend in Guadalajara so the city is ghost.

Everyone's headed off to Puerto Vallarta about 5 hours off.

Getting there you drive through the town of "Tequila" where the world's supply of tequila is created from blue agave plants, which you see growing in vast fields on the sides of the roads.


Funny driving by the town that's the source of the drink so many people around the world pump into themselves year after year.

Imagine growing up in the town of Tequila??

You'd probably either love drinking or think it's the most boring thing in the world.


Rest of the drive has some great moments.

Love blasting through valleys, up and down hills.


Fascinating to see lifestyle contrast between local economy and American tourist dollars.


Hmmmmmm, are these pics from the same region??

Yes the two neighbourhoods are about fourty five minutes away from eachother.

One is the tourist area, the other is the community that lies beyond.


Tourists, mostly who've flown into the tourist area of Puerto Vallarta directly from the US and Canada, enjoying the authentic Mexican experience.

Hahahaha, to each their own... :)


One night out clubbing. Streets were going crazy. Had a great time.

Wake up the next morning and definitely ready to bounce -- like Vegas it's an in-and-out type vibe.


Drive past the clubbing area in the daytime's so funny.

Street was GOING OFF just the night before, chill and mellow during the day.

So the deal is this.....

Gotta make it back to Guadalajara for the flight to Cancun by tomorrow morning.

Highways are packed bumper to bumper with Easter weekend wrapping up, so plenty of time to kill.

What's cool to do in Puerto Vallarta during the day??

Hearing rumours that the set of Arnold's classic "The Predator" is half an hour up the road.

Gotta be kidding.


Hit the road, locate a dirt path we follow up into the hills.

Thought this was a really innovative way of babysitting the kids -- who needs parenting when you can leave the little bastards in a chained up trampolene??


YES!!

The Predator. A true honour. Feeling so blessed.


Alright, so here's what gets me.

Arnold Swarzenneger........THE MAN.

Living his life and having a ball doing it.

Becomes a mega movie star, nearly a billionaire businessman, marries into the Kennedy family, gets elected by the people of California to govern one of the most prosperous economies in the world.

Meanwhile TWENTY YEARS LATER this little shred of his past existence, like a faint dream in his mind, is still going -- possibly the cheesiest tourist concept known to man.

Wonder if he knows about it. What would he think??

Open-air restaurant and surrounding jungle is pretty darned cool though, gotta say.

Thought I'd get this tee-shirt and hat for Jeffy cause he gets tickled by this type of absurdity -- but figured photo and appropriate posedown was probably equally bizarre.


Way out is nice.

Sun is going down and I want to make it to Sayulita on the way back before dark.


Had to first scramble down a semi steep dirt hill to get a good view of this interesting looking rock.

Perched up against a tree, gotta stop getting distracted and make it to Sayulita!!


Story behind it is this...

So my buddy Alex Allman hears I'm in Mexico and emails me about a mutual wealthy friend of ours who's left California and relocated permanently to this little surf town called "Sayulita".

Fourty five minutes outside Puerto Vallarta.

Gotta to be pretty unique cause dude could live almost anywhere in the world.

He's off to California while we pass through, we're fine to do our own thing.

Get into town just before dark -- miscalculated the sunset, but hey, at least we got to spend an extra hour in awe of the Predator. Woops.

Arrive in Sayulita and it appears like a typically low-income town from the outskirts. Shacks and all that.

Initially sceptical but driving in it's looking more and more interesting.


Slick, very slick. Love it.

Downtown is full of life and good vibes. Mexico meets the happiness factor of Disneyworld.

Everyone's walking around, surfers, tourists, co-existing happily with the locals from what it seems.

There's apparently big mansions up in the hills but can't see them at night.

Restaurants are the bomb. People are congregating at the Zocalo watching a dance troop.

Cool little stores, like this one with the sand floor, it's obvious why this place is addictive.

A few hours in and out, and it's back to Guadalajara for the flight to Cancun.


Figure it's some cheesy tourist joint. Really no idea what to expect.

Growing up in Canada you hear about the rich and popular kids going to Cancun on vacation. Travelling was outside my reality back then so stories always went in one ear out the other.

On the map it looks like some sort of crazy long peninsula. Hard to figure what it looks like in real life.

Flying at night you see the long thin lit up strips of hotels down below.

Stars are out and the ground is blotted out with jungle, the long runs of hotels extending out into the ocean.

Sounds funny to say about a spot like Cancun but from the air it looks mysterious and intriguing.

What the heck is this place??


Apparently it's a square shaped peninsula that's got rows upon rows of expensive resorts lined one after another.

The perfect setup for American tourists because allows them to enjoy the glory-times beach and weather without having to endure too many encounters with real Mexicans.

There's hotels like the "Grand Mayan" which are like an Americanized Mexican-bastardization that actually exist in Mexico. Like the classic Leo Dicaprio flick "The Beach" where the tourists fly all the way to the country just to do the things they do back home.

Regardless Cancun is a part of Mexican culture in that it represents the second highest source of revenue for the country.

So much so that when the peninsula was flattened by Hurricane Wilma it was rebuilt in record time.

And on the good side they've got an unbelievable blue to their ocean and perfect white sand -- all visible from almost every hotel.

Anyway asking around, asking around...

Keep hearing there's a much tighter spot called "Playa Del Carmen" about 45 minutes up the road.

Chill spot of choice for Europeans, let's see if it lives up to the hype.


Uhhhhhh.....Yes!!

Playa Del Carmen is loaded with super trendy & chill lounges similar to Cafe Del Mar in Ibiza -- literally perfect for bootcamp and playing a little POOOAH.

I will be back, to live. Next year 100% for sure.


No need to check out the local pyramids and ruins because I'm coming back. Gives me something to look forward to.

Anyway it's about that time.

Pack the suitcases and hit the airport for the final flight before heading back to the US -- off to Cabo Sans Lucas with connection via Mexico City.


Flying out of Quintana Roo in the daytime, jungle extends outwards as far as the eye can see.


Clean air, clean ocean, nice clear day. Beautiful.

Recommended: CLICK these pics to make them full sized and see how the landscape changes as you approach Mexico City.


Flying over mountains outside the D.F. it's harder to see the ground as the air becomes tinted with a slight grey.


There's miles of industrial excavations outside the city.


Human habitation starts a long way out from Centro because it's so sprawling, endless, and vast.


Sky is tinted with white/grey such that only the landscape below you is visible.


Try to look too far up, left, or right and you can't see properly due to the air pollution that's trapped in the "bowl shaped" city by the surrounding mountains.


Keep flying and flying, with endless urban sprawl.


As you land some colonias (aka -- neighbourhoods) are more visible because they've taken the effort to plant an unusually high number of trees.

The green parts of the city are very pleasant because so few metropolises are innundated with as many trees as the wealthy parts of the D.F.

What the local government needs to do is spread that out throughout the rest of the city -- or use some sort of vegetation that can grow all over literally every building from top to bottom and clean the air.


And there it is. Landed in Mexico City once again.

Like everyone I've got a love/hate relationship with the place.

Hot clubs, hot women, all the high society stuff you can ever want.

It's exciting and cultural and you could explore the place endlessly for months at a time.

Pros and cons, pros and cons.

Stay in the airport for about an hour and board the airplane for Cabo.


Fly past Guadalajara again...

Then over the Gulf of California (aka -- Mar de Cortés) to reach the deserts of Baja California Sur.


Rolling deserts with bright colors.

Overhead it looks different from anywhere I've ever been.


First time exploring this type of terrain.

It's not the lush green landscapes I've come to appreciate in Hawaii but equally beautiful in it's own way.


Landing in Cabo we're introduced to the trade that basically built a brand new economy in the middle of the desert -- timeshare sales.

The locals are all in on it, from the guy who helps you with your bags to the taxi driver to the hotel clerks to the waitresses.

Never have I seen such fearless and aggressive salesmen anywhere -- we could all learn something from the way they "plow" and have no fear of rejection.


Dodge and weave our way past them to the rental car and go for the convertible.

One hour drive from the airport to Cabo Sans Lucas is extreme happy fun times -- one of the most stunning of my life.


Wake up the next morning to a beach so bright I can barely open my eyes.

Los Arcos is the symbol that Cabo is known for and while in pictures it might look random in real life it is obvious why.


Time to hit the trails, see how far we can make it up the peninsula before it gets dark.


Driving there are many government housing projects.

To an American they likely look whatever, but they're a luxury in comparison to the standard ghettos I've been seeing through the rest of the country (particularly in the South).


Seeing the region by car is a lot like flying over by airplane, except close up and personal.


On the way up the peninsula we discover an ATV'ing spot, where I teach the GF how it's done.

ATV'ing winds up becoming a lifetime hobby of mine during this trip. Fully addicted.


Trail leads up to a vista of countryside.

Relax for a bit, then it's back home before dark.


And finally, after six weeks..............it's the final day in Mexico.

Can't believe I'm going back to the US. Mixed emotions. Gotta make it good.

Decide to head up towards the small surfer towns on the coast.

Pass through the "non-tourist" areas on the outskirts of the city (you know what that means) and make it through an ocean of cactuses.

Never seen this many before, blasting down the road to make it as far out as possible and then head back in before dark -- preferably avoiding traversing the non-tourist areas in a convertible on the way back in.


Towards sundown we spot a road sketchy dirt road down the to the ocean off in the distance.

Drive down the road and stumble onto a spot that rents ATVs.

These are not just regular ATVs. These are standard transmission, high powered beasts.

And the trail is leading off along the hills tracing the ocean. It must be explored.

It's closing time. Everybody's going home. Gotta convince the manager to let us take one last ride.


The owner agrees to offer a private tour.

Teach the girlfriend how to operate the standard transmission (years of living with my insanity -- she is hardcore), and we're off ripping into the hills.


Experience with the owner is really uplifting.

Barely spoke to the guy, but was not necessary. He comes across as a very enlightened dude.

Grounded, humble, value offering, and seemingly very at peace with himself. Simultaneously charismatic and respected with his employees and 100% in control of his world.

He's from the coast of Spain near Morocco, the business and surrounding trail sites he's entirely set up on his own.

He takes pride in his work and our enjoyment of the tour without wanting any credit for it. At the end he will not accept a tip, and gives the GF the sweater off his back so she'll be warm on the drive home.

For me it represented the type of peace that can be learned from spending your life working hard and in the outdoors, and also, a reminder that there are very good people in the world.


Turns out we don't make the drive home before dark.

Side of the road is covered in dead cows -- the GF spots about 5 or 6 on the way back to the hotel.

Farmers apparently don't fence them in, so every night it's cow happy time on the highways of Los Cabos.

Get lost for a while in the sketchy neighbourhoods, but after six weeks in Mexico it's all good.

Final night in Mexico. Gotta pack and get some sleep.

Can't believe I'm heading home. Mixed emotions. It was an adventure.

Next two weeks are to be in Los Angeles for instructor training.

Then it's Spring in Hawaii, Summer in Europe, and of course the upcoming Africa and South America trips.

Lots of travelling ahead of me in the coming months. Got a mountain of work to do in Honolulu to prepare.

Flying back into Los Angeles it looks like the entire city is paved in diamonds and gold.

How is it possible?? This money?? This opulence??

In the same way Mexico looked so strange at first, having been away from the US it now looks almost absurd.

(That's me reppin' Hawaii with the hang-loose).

Mexico was a tough trip for me.

At various points I slipped into a mindset of "What the heck am I doing here??" and considered packing up and going home.

There's something about that "reptilian brain" that wants to have a lair that's stable to go back to.

Travelling might seem glorious but it's also draining and throws a monkey wrench into all the daily routines that keep you stable and on track.

At times driving through hours upon hours of poverty between cities I felt like I couldn't look at it anymore -- like I just wanted to shut my mind off and pretend it didn't exist.

I'm the type of dude where I have a hard time just experiencing life passively.

I've learned to experience my emotions a lot more vividly in the past years and when I'm new to an environment my brain is soaking up everything like a sponge.

Driving through the outskirts of the cities in Guererro, with the burnt out buildings and garbage and lack of resources -- it felt like I was in a movie I needed to turn off.

It wasn't so much that it existed (social problems exist everywhere and always will) but rather the MILES AND MILES of it.

The social challenges in the world are so vast that most people just choose to ignore them.

Government is oftentimes slow to act and bogged down in bureaucracy, as we see with the education system's inability to stay on the cutting-edge.

As a business owner I look at the speed of implementation in these organizations and just cringe.

Privitization also comes with it's own sets of problems, and then of course, there's the cultural aspect that many people simply have no desire to elevate themselves because it's outside their existing reality.

Then you have the issue of globalization and consumerism where the question is whether our "advanced" society is even desirable in the first place.

I really have no answers to this and I doubt that anyone does at this point.

The more I learn the more I realize I don't know, and that many of my old opinions were pure "know it all" speculation.

To be a leader all you can do is experience the world with a fresh set of eyes, study study study, and become the type of competent and affluent person who has the ability to make things happen.

In the meantime you've gotta have a lot of fun, because if you lose sight of that, then you become myopic and the bigger picture becomes lost.

Mexico was a unique place and a profound experience because of it's highs and lows, it's vast cultural diversity, and it's amazing people.

I've spoken about travelling a lot after having so many intense experiences over the years -- and I've always thought about doing an article that opens up a window into my world.

Oftentimes I think people get put off with the level of enthusiasm I have for everything I do, and maybe that's because they've done similar types of things and didn't find them to be as climatic or profound.

For me it is just the opposite of that, maybe because I was never a guy who was supposed to make it this far, and it is just the most amazing thing.

Finally I thought I'd stop thinking about writing something up and actually just put the pad to paper (figuratively), which is what this long diatribe has really been all about.

Hopefully you've enjoyed it, and maybe found a source of motivation for doing whatever things in life it is that YOU personally want to do.

Thanks for checking it out.


Tyler

Appreciating What The People In Your Life Bring To The Table

Pic of the crew down at the FN Superconference in Australia.

Man I wish I was there...

Anyway wanted to get into a really important article, and while it may not come across as climatic, if the title has grabbed you on any level I recommend you read it carefully all the way through.

Maybe you know this stuff already, and in that case it's a reminder.

Or maybe you've been walking through life without a map like this, and it's really what you need to hear.

I want to talk about a tendency today that I've watched friends and foes alike use to destroy their own lives and happiness.

This the tendency of failing to appreciate (or perhaps better stated -- to *forget*) what the people you surround yourself with are bringing to the table.

We're talking classic self-sabotage here.

Screw Your Life Up 101.

We all do it to various extents, it's just a matter of how much we're able to recognize and keep it in check.

I've seen it over and over, especially in situations where people's lives are about to hit a "next level".

Here is my opinion of how and why this occurs.

Basically we all have a concept in our minds about how much success we're supposed to have in life.

Most people think that success is a positive event that they would welcome.

That's not entirely true however -- or at least, life doesn't tend to be that simple.

In reality any time your quality of life starts to accelerate past your mind's unconscious concept of where you're "supposed" to be you are now leaving your comfort zone.

When this happens, you slam into what's known as a "success barrier".

And what happens next??

The good old "RAS" (reticular activation system -- the psychological mechanism that makes you FOCUS on certain events and SCREEN OUT others) kicks in and starts playing tricks on you.

Rationalizations deluxe.

You start to focus on petty bullshit, lose sight of the big picture, and forget just how far it is you've come.

(Not to mention how far down you'll fall when you return to your old situation).

Oftentimes this comes in the form of allowing disputes to escalate with the people in your life who are most helping to move you forward.

Why??

Because it's those valuable relationships that your mind recognizes as being the easiest leverage-points to sabotage and bring you back down to your previous life.

"So-and-so doesn't really appreciate me..."

"They have no idea what I'm bringing to the table, they'd be so lost without me..."

"The biggest source of stress in my life is so and so...I could be so much happier and do so much better on my own..."

Etc etc.

Now sometimes this is actually true.

To be a winner in life you need to recognize the people who are polluting your mental/spiritual space with negative influence and allow them to go their separate ways.

At the same time, the key to remember is that if you got involved with the person in the first place then surely there WAS a good reason for it at one point.

Moreover, the brutal reality is that oftentimes you need to look at YOURSELF.

Because if you're failing to get along with one person then there's a decent chance that the same dysfunctional tendency will rear it's head in your next relationship as well.

I can say personally that whenever I've fought with my girlfriend I've always had to take a pause and ask myself some hard questions like (and these sound easy -- but they're a lot tougher than just letting your mind go off into it's indignant default state):

"What's causing this??"

"Even if it's her, is this behaviour totally independent or is it a mirror of something I'm putting out there??"

"Realistically if I broke up would I wind up in the same type of argument with my next girlfriend as well??"

Being in a relationship when your job is to take out guys to pick up other girls on the weekends is not easy.

But just by asking these types of questions I've been able to do what no other "POOOAH guru" I'm aware of has done successfully -- maintain a relationship for nearly 4 years.

One thing you'll notice about me is also that I've never spoken a negative word publically about anyone I've ever been involved with.

Obviously that's because it's second-class behaviour and I expect more from myself.

But more importantly, it's also because I recognize if I've had a falling out with someone that it's more important to focus on what I can learn from it than it is to run around trying to rally people towards my opinion so my ego can say "Look!! Everyone agrees with me!! I must be right!!"

The way I see it is life is a learning-curve.

You always have the option to keep evolving to the next paradigm for as long as you're interested -- which means becoming a better person and more fit to live in the world with every single year of your life.

For me, every relationship -- whether with business or women or students or friends -- is an opportunity to become better at relating to people.

I know in my case in the first few years of running RSD I allowed a lot of relationships to go sour.

In the following years I learned from it and probably managed to cut that out of my life ten fold -- where now even with a 100+ person staff and over 100 times more clients who I come into contact with, I've learned to relate to people on a level that I know is Win/Win.

Will that always be the case??

Of course not. But it's continued to improve.

I know with Papa (AKA Nick Kho -- CEO of Real Social Dynamics) and myself there are probably no two people who are more opposite on this earth.

That's both in terms of our personalities as well as our 180 degree different visions for RSD.

We communicate differently, we think very differently, we look at the world ENTIRELY differently.

Any day of the week, if you know us both, you can look at RSD as an organization and figure out which element was Papa's decision and which one was mine.

But we work through it and we compromise -- and that's why the organization has weathered adversity for all these years.

It reminds of a few years back reading the epic "Atlas Shrugged" by Ayn Rand.

Instantly I related to how the lead character, Dagny Taggert, had the brother who insisted she produce her usual stellar results despite that he was cutting her off of from the resources she needed to do so.

The brother would yell and scream to get what he wanted -- thinking he could "shut his eyes to reality" and make enough of a stink that the world would just magically alter itself to accomodate his unrealistic ideals.

At the time, and as a guy a few years younger than I am now, I felt like that was Papa and I.

Contained in my own personal myth was the idea of myself as the creative guy who produced the programs that we were known for.

Nick was the guy who wanted me to keep creating more of these at the same high calibre -- but at a faster rate because he had no concept of the time and effort that was involved.

With more experience, however, I began to grasp the old self help principle of "Seek first to understand, then to be understood."

The more realistic perspective of the matter is that both Nick and I slipped back and forth between the various roles.

On one level, with only 16 waking hours in a day Nick wasn't realistic to think I'd produce the type of material RSD is known for at a faster rate.

At the same time, one thing I didn't realize was that in many ways the person who was acting like Dagny Taggart's brother from the story was ME.

In insisting that product quality match my vision to the most obnoxious extent (far beyond what 99% of people could even recognize or appreciate), I was ignoring the reality that Papa was being forced to pull nerve-wracking highwire acts to find the venture-capital to keep us afloat.

RSD is an entity far larger than myself, and it is not my personal empire to make meet my every creative impulse any more than it is Papa's to use as a personal piggybank.

My rigidity nearly bankrupted us several times over the years, and that put Nick under a stress that I could never understand without having been in his shoes.

It is very easy, for example, to say "Fuck anyone who's in it for the money."

But there's also a harsh reality to money, and unless you've been in the situation where you're forced to come up with it out of thin air like Nick, your opinion really doesn't mean shit.

So see, in the same way I'd read Atlas Shrugged and thought "If Nick read this he'd instantly understand where I'm coming from" if Nick were to read the same book (which incidentally he has recently but we haven't talked about it) he would very likely think in reverse the same thing.

We are ALL the heroes and justified individuals in our own personal mythology.

We're in the right, God is on our side, and everyone who doesn't see that is just fucked.

But in reality, or at least as close to it as we can get, the people we surround ourselves with often bring more to the table than we can possibly realize unless we pause and take stock.

It is extremely easy to forget, and a very hard thing to focus on when we're feeling self-justified and looking to lay the blame.

(Especially in the same neurotic detail that we focus on the other person's bad sides when we're in a "mood").

I mean really, how often do you stop to be appreciative for what you get out of your relationships in comparison to how much you spend thinking about the downsides and the bigger and better deal??

But that's unchecked human nature in all it's glory...

Our inflated delusional egos which seek to give us confidence that we don't need anybody -- maybe serving the purpose of allowing us to put on a front so people won't think we need them too much -- which causes us to make these bone-headed moves.

And you know, probably a good 50% of people reading this are engaged in a self-dialogue right now where they're saying "This overly optimistic bullshit doesn't apply to me, I don't get into "moods", blah blah blah."

Of course it's not going to get them anywhere, but at least it will keep their belief systems temporarily intact.

In the meantime, I'm trying to focus on what's good about the people in my life, and bringing more of that energy in my direction every single day.

Have fun!!


Tyler

RSD Goes To St. Patty's Day

Man, choices choices...

I had to miss out on this one to tour Mexico. Wish I was there.

Ridiculous article and multimedia extravaganza on Alex's blog. Run over right now and check it out.

www.alexattitude.com

And leave the dude some comments!!

See you soon.


Tyler